Football Picks With Bad TV Cliches, Part 2

Welcome back, obviously you don't think I'm totally clueless about this whole "football picks" thing if you have returned for the eagerly awaited second half of my yearly football predictions. As I said last week, we all care about the NFL, but I especially care about Syracuse, Susquehanna, and West Genesee, so this week is devoted to them. Why? Well, I'm from Syracuse, so I'm a lifelong Orange fan. I graduated from West Genesee High School and Susquehanna University, so I consider myself bigtime fans of their football teams. Also, in the case of West Genny, I've got to clear up some nastiness that has been occuring of late in cyberspace. That comes later, though; first up, let's get the Orangemen out of the way.

As of the time I'm writing this, the quarterback issue is of course still not resolved, and won't be until kickoff against the dangerous (yeah, right) Buffalo Bulls on September 2. Obviously for Buffalo, whomever the starting signal caller is won't matter much; SU could beat UB with ME starting at quarterback. Oh by the way, that "we have four quarterbacks, one for each quarter" joke was cute for about five minutes, now it's just plain annoying. So, who do I think gets the job?

Will it be Troy Nunes, the incumbent starter? (cue the organ)

Will it be RJ Anderson, the hotshot freshman? (again, cue the organ)

Will it be Chad Elliott, the JUCO transfer? (cue the organ yet again)

Will it be Madei Williams? Skip the organ, it will not be Madei Williams.

Simply put, Williams was second out of two last year, what makes anyone think he will suddenly emerge as the best of four this year. Do us all a favor, Madei, and switch to receiver. It worked for Kevin Johnson, it works for Malik Campbell, it might just work for you. NEXT!!!

RJ Anderson: I know there are a lot of you Orange fans who feel that RJ Anderson is the second coming of Donovan McNabb, and yes, we knew about as much about McNabb at this point in his freshman year as we do now about Anderson. Sorry, folks, it's not going to happen. Anderson is running third in my eyes right now, which may precipitate a switch to linebacker, and don't go getting your tar and feathers ready, RJ has said he doesn't have a problem with that. NEXT!!!

We're down to Nunes and Elliott. First of all, I got my best laugh in months when I read that Lindy's, well respected preview magazine that it is, proclaimed Troy Nunes as one of the "sophomores to watch" this year. That said, the main thing going against Nunes is the fact that when we hear the name Troy Nunes, the first thing we think of is his infamous 30-yard scramble in the wrong direction that led to what may have been the game-deciding safety against Michigan last year. When he got the whole game to himself in the Music City Bowl, he did pretty darn good. Pretty darn good against Va Tech or Miami ain't gonna be good enough. Nunes is the most qualified to run an option offense like Syracuse's, but he can't throw the deep ball.

And then there's Elliott: the guy started at Arizona State as a freshman, anything less than that here will probably make him reconsider the whole "coming to the frozen North" decision. He has the arm all right, which is good, with deep threats like Pat Woodcock, Maurice Jackson, and the frosh Johnnie Morant to throw to. However, he's never had to run the option. You need speed and elusiveness to run the option; I would submit Don McPherson, Marvin Graves, and Donovan McNabb as Exhibits A, B, and C for that. As bally-hooed as he is, I can't see it, not right now.

Therefore, it is Troy Nunes' job to lose. Yeah, folks, that means you can cancel your travel plans for Miami in early January, there will be no National Championship Game, no BCS for that matter. The true test of Troy Nunes comes September 23 against East Carolina. SU is probably 2-0 at that point, having polished off Buffalo and Cincinnati. If Nunes excels against the Pirates and again the next week against BYU, the job is his. If not, Elliott gets his shot.

There, see how easy that was?

As for the rest of the team, we know the D is solid, no argument there. The front seven is experienced and if there's anything we can never bicker about, it's SU's ability to stop the run. The secondary has to step up, and it's up to Will Allen and Quentin Harris especially to step up. They've been around long enough to know what it's going to take to stop teams from running up 300-yard passing games. The microscope of course is on the offense, can they score enough points to make up for a rare day off by the defense when and if it happens? The Orange can run the ball, but the question is who runs it more? Obvious answer there: Kyle Johnson. OK, OK, I know, you meant between Dee Brown and James Mungro. Mungro has to get the ball more than last year, he proved that against Kentucky. He will get it more, but Dee still has to get his touches, and freshman Walter Reyes may also get into the mix. He's impressed many in the early going of preseason camp. The O-line is better than last year, but thinner, so staying healthy is key.

So, how will they finish? 7-4 looks good to me. Virginia Tech and Miami play us at the Dome, and we've certainly done better against the Hokies at home than in Blacksburg in recent years, but the SU will probably drop both. Sorry if you don't want to hear that, but I've gotta be honest. The other two losses will come from the following: East Carolina, BYU, West Virginia, Boston College, and Pittsburgh. Maybe they'll go 8-3 or better, maybe they'll shock the world and beat the Hokies and Hurricanes, and don't get me wrong, I'd love that to happen, but I've got to stick to my guns on this one.

Now, on to the OTHER SU, as in the one that actually HAS a shot at a conference title. Susquehanna got by last year with their defense; this year, it's the offense people will be looking at. Mike Bowman's got a year under his belt as starter, and other than the Lycoming game where he wound up scoring more points for Lyco than for his own team thanks to a few interceptions, he was very impressive for a freshman. He has all his targets back and then some, with the transfer of Mark Bartosic from Bucknell. The locals saw quite a few B-to-B hookups for touchdowns at nearby Shikellamy High School, and we can look forward to three more years of it at brand-spanking new Lopardo Stadium. Tim Ronchi and John Smith are also back and were very reliable last year. Raschon Drayton returns to lead the backfield, and he gets help from another local product, Isaac Hernandez, and also Ryan Cidzik, who West Genny fans will remember from his days at RFA. They will get plenty of chances to run the ball with the Crusaders' Delaware Wing-T offense, but look for Bowman to get lots of opportunities to air it out as well, plus he can also scramble when he needs to. The O-line has two preseason all-stars in Dave Wonderlick and Randy Zook, so Bowman may not have to scramble all that much.

The D is still no slouch, not with returning Little All-American Antonio Nash at cornerback for three more years. David Howard and Mario Cromartie also anchor a very solid Crusader secondary. Frank Hanlon, Troy Sosnovik, and Dom DeSteno lead a young but experienced front seven. The key to the season may be finding adequate replacements for the graduated Torrance Cleveland, Casey Goff, and Denny Bowers. If the brothers Briggs can pull that off, their season will probably go more than 10 games this year. Special teams are very good with Andy Nadler at kicker and Ryan Hollis at punter.

The schedule is certainly tough. SU opens Lopardo Stadium on September 23 against Dickinson, which is always a battle, Juniata will provide more than a match on Homecoming October 7, and of course, there's always Lyco, who everyone is picking to win the MAC. The fact that the Crusaders have to play the Warriors at Williamsport this year will likely wind up sticking SU with its only regular-season blemish. So, unless there's another debacle a la the Lebanon Valley game last year, I expect the Crusaders to go 9-1, three-peat as Commonwealth League Champs, and go on to the NCAA Tournament for the first time since 1991. And no, that's not my orange and maroon talking

Finally, West Genesee. It has become apparent that ever since the young Wildcats heard the phrase "Delaware Wing-T", some of them have started making plans for the Dome. I contribute often to the high school football forum at Syracuse Online, and frankly, the breast-beating has annoyed me. Let me break it down for you, or you can just go to the WG football page and see for yourself: West Genesee has not made the postseason since 1988, has not won sectionals since that same year, and has not won a league title since 1982. Having said that, I do believe Dave Mancuso is a great coach, and he has certainly brought the program back from the 0-8 mess that Rob Cummings left him in 1997.

Now, I've seen the Delaware Wing-T offense in action at Susquehanna, and it's a tough set to stop, but equally tough to learn. That may put added pressure on quarterback Aaron Kelly to excel in the passing game, which he did last year. It won't all come together in one preseason camp, game experience is the only sure way to put it all together, which leads to the assumption that the Wildcats will improve as the season progresses. While the offense is learning these new sets, the focus is on the defense, and they get a test right away from Corcoran's high-powered attack. I'd say that by halftime Friday night September 1st, we'll know what kind of team WG will give us this season.

With the Cougars and RFA both in the early part of the schedule, I stand by the prediction that West Genny can only get better as the season goes along. If they can get through the early battles without getting too badly beaten up, they have a realistic shot at 4-3 and a trip to sectionals. Now all of you reading this have some bone of contention probably with that, and of course, that's what the reaction board is for. So, have at it folks, and I'll see ya at the stadium!

Football Picks With Bad TV Cliches, Part 1

Now, I'm no analyst. If anything, I need analysis, but enough about my psychological situation. The time has come for me to predict and prognosticate (which means the same thing, but sounds like something Dennis Miller might say) the upcoming football season. We all care about the NFL, so I'll offer up my predictions on that right now. As for me alone, I care about Syracuse, Susquehanna, and West Genesee, so later in the month, I'll try to look into my non-existent crystal ball and pull a decent prediction out of my ahhh, I mean the air, that's right.

OK, pros first, and I'll start in the AFC East, as that has my favorite team, the New York Jets. The rookies have impressed in training camp, Vinnie looks OK, but there's no Keyshawn and Al Groh (which sounds more like the guy TV's "Rhoda" married) is now the coach. There is no division title in the future for these guys, not with the Colts in their division. A wild card could certainly happen, though. Indianapolis is the clear favorite in the AFC East. If anything, they're better than they were last year, they're a year older, they're deeper, especially at running back. They get the division and likely home field throughout the playoffs. After that, it's a dogfight for the wildcard berth (singular, there can be only one) between the Bills and Jets. First one to 10 wins gets it, otherwise the head-to-head matchups may decide things. Rob Johnson is the man in Buffalo mostly by default (no Flutie due to his groin injury), and the young receiving corps has to jell quick in order to get the offense anywhere. Defensively, Marcellus Wiley is the key; if he's healthy, he can be a good replacement for Bruce Smith. The secondary needs help and will probably be exploited often. New England will need a year or two to get it together under Bill Belichick, here's hoping he is given that long. Miami brings up the rear. Damon Huard did win more games than Dan Marino as starter last year, but the offense isn't too good, and if Huard goes down, the Dolphins may challenge for next year's top draft pick.

In the AFC Central, three teams battle for the division crown, and all three should make the postseason. Jacksonville's paper-thin offensive line could make it a long season if it can't keep Mark Brunell from getting hurt. However, there always seems to be a backup QB who can get it done when he is called on (in the past, Rob Johnson and Jay Fiedler have done this). The Titans are just plain solid, they don't have many weaknesses, and the defense is even better with the addition of Keith Bulluck (a Syracuse grad, I might add). Baltimore is the trendy pick with the addition of Shannon Sharpe and a rock-solid defense. The offense is the X-factor, and all the pressure falls on the quarterback. Tony Banks and Scott Mitchell don't exactly scare anyone. I'm going with Tennessee first, the Jags second, and the Ravens third. As for the rest of the decision, Plaxico Burress helps Kordell Stewart out a little in Pittsburgh, but first Stewart has to learn to throw to Burress and not the guy covering him. Cleveland has a year under its belt, and has no place to go but up. The Bengals, on the other hand, aren't going anywhere, not with Darnay Scott on IR, Corey Dillon in exile, and Carl Pickens in Nashville. At least they have a new stadium.

The AFC West is wide-open, with no clear-cut favorite. I only have one team making the postseason, as I figure that all five teams will spend the season beating each other up. I am picking Seattle. Why? Well, for background, I've liked the Seahawks since the Dennis Erickson-Joey Galloway days, and they always underachieve. Not this year, not with a year under Mike Holmgren behind them. The guy doesn't like to sit at home in January, and it won't happen this year. Maybe the friendly outdoor confines of Husky Stadium will help as well. If they falter, Oakland can steal the division. The Raiders did well under Jon Gruden in season one, and Sebastian Janikowski gives them a chance to win games they wouldn't have won in the past. Now all Sebastian has to do is stay out of the police blotter. Denver will bounce back from its bad '99, but not enough to make it to the playoffs. Kansas City and San DIego can't do better than mediocre this year, but in this division, that might just prove lucky for them.

Switching to the NFC, the division winners are a little easier to predict, especially in the East. If you aren't picking Washington to win the NFC East, you are nuts. The defense is too good to finish 30th again, not with Ray Rhodes running things, Bruce Smith and Deion Sanders providing veteran leadership, and the occasional LaVar Leap from rookie linebacker Arrington. Brad Johnson and Jeff George are the best 1-2 QB combo in the NFL, although how Daniel Snyder managed to fit both under the cap probably required more paperwork and loopholes than your last tax return. The race is for second, as it may determine a wild-card berth, as Arizona, New York, and Philadelphia will all fall around the .500 mark. Arizona needs to stay healthy, especially Jake Plummer, and the same goes for the Giants. Ron Dayne probably won't be the breakout star people think he'll be, but he should take the heat off Kerry Collins. In Philly, Donovan McNabb is polished and ready to do to the NFC East what he did to the Big East in college. The defense needs to stay injury-free and the offensive line has to do a better job protecting McNabb than it did last year. Dallas is on the way down, but still expect Troy Aikman and Joey Galloway to run up some impressive numbers.

As usual, the NFC Central is the Black and Blue Division, as all 5 teams have a shot at the playoffs. Now, I know everyone is penciling in Tampa Bay as the runaway favorite, but I'm still on the fence. I look at Shaun King and the Bucs offense, and all I see is that 45-0 pasting Oakland gave them last December. They'll have to be more consistent to contend for the Super Bowl; Keyshawn Johnson does help greatly, but the running game is suspect. The challengers are Green Bay and Chicago. The Pack has renewed focus under Mike Sherman, but Favre and Levens are banged up. All they need to do to make it to January, though, is win 9 games, and that's certainly do-able. The Bears are a shaky third; Curtis Enis and Cade McNown haven't exactly set the world on fire since entering the NFL, expecting them to do just that may be too much to ask. Sorry Minnesota, Daunte Culpepper is not worth giving up Randall Cunningham and Jeff George over. And as for Detroit, Charlie Batch needs to stay healthy (how many times am I going to have to use the phrase "needs to stay healthy"?) and James Stewart has to prove he's worth every dollar William Clay Ford is giving him for the Lions to make the playoffs.

For years, I have called the NFC West the worst division in football, and this year it holds true to form. The Rams will have the thing clinched in November again, and the Falcons and Panthers can only hope to finish at .500. Kurt Warner, Marshall Faulk, the great receivers; there should be a lot of bobbing-and-weaving going on this year, or actually there would be had the NFL not banned such celebrations (don't get me started on that, it'll probably be the subject of a future "This Just In"). Atlanta will have Jamal Anderson back, but Chris Chandler and the defense isn't getting any younger, and the same goes for Steve Beuerlein and the Carolina D. The 49ers and Saints will likely battle with the Bengals for the right to have their name next to "are now on the clock..." next April.

Teenage Mafia

It has become apparent that there are only two groups of people who aren't allowed to congregate in large groups: teenagers and Mafia types.

No disrespect to the Mafia, of course; I want to live past tomorrow, after all. However, there is, was, and always will be people who see a group of three or more teenagers walking their way and move as far to the other side of the walkway as possible. This was brought to my attention earlier this week when a caller to a talk show I help produce gave his top concern about the proposed expansion at Carousel Mall. For those of you who don't know, Carousel Mall is the thing you see the billboards for in Scranton and other Northeastern cities that wish they could be Syracuse. Anyhoo, this particular caller said that before any kind of expansion should take place, the city should take a closer look at getting rid of the major danger in the existing mall: teenagers. He went on and on about all these 14 and 15-year old boys and girls stalking throughout the mall, especially Friday and Saturday nights. Surely they must have some sort of evil, criminal intent.

Uh, perhaps it hasn't occured to this person or many others who think like him, but MAYBE THEY'RE SHOPPING!!! Teenagers these days have a ton of money, mostly cuz their parents have a ton of money, and they are much more advanced than my generation was at the lost art of getting said money out of said parents. So if you are a teenager, what do you do with this money? Well, one would hope save it, but your college education is probably set (community college at worst), and so you go spend it. And where are you going to spend it? Yes, the Net is fast becoming a good place to spend it, but first you have to get Mom and Dad's credit card numbers, and you still remember not so fondly the two months you were grounded the last time you tried to pull that off. So, it's much easier to go to the mall, and let's face it, your parents and those of your friends in the neighborhood would like nothing more than get rid of all of you for a couple of hours, so the one who is brave enough to pile all of you into his or her car (or the one who lost when they drew straws THIS week) shleps you all off to the mall for a couple of hours. The majority of them around here wind up at Carousel.

I personally have no problem with people of this age wandering about, if anything it makes me pine for the days when I didn't have bills or car repairs and I was spending someone's money other than my own (thanks Mom). The worst that ever happens to me is some give me a look of utter disgust, which makes sense cuz I'm not "one of them" (see last week's column). I do not feel threatened by these kids at all, and besides, being a man, I have two objectives when I go to the mall: 1) to get what I came to get, and 2) to leave. Now if I were to go driving around on the South Side after dark, well, that's another story.

I would like to think we are past the days when instead of "don't trust anyone over 30", it's "don't trust anyone under 20". However, there are still many older people out there who have this philosophy. And because this IS Syracuse we're talking about, where an abnormally large amount of the population is collecting their Social Security, it's apparently a problem here. Memo to these people then: they're for the most part harmless. I often go to Carousel and have never once seen a robbery, beating, stabbing, shooting, mugging, etc. Other than the occasional nutjob taking the express route from the third floor to the commons level (and by that I DON'T mean the elevator), this mall is for the most part an uneventful place. Believe me when I tell you that Generation Y is much more concerned with the 25% off sale at Abercrombie and Fitch than starting a youth uprising in the major economic center of our area. In regards to the youth of America, and in particular, the youth of the greater Syracuse area (great and Syracuse in the same phrase, that's an oxymoron), I am an optimist. Their parents are doing a good job, and if you surveyed these kids, you would be pleasantly surprised at their sense of right and wrong. Of course, if I get flamed by a bunch of kids in response to this column, my overall opinion is subject to change.

And as far as the Mafia quip at the start of this column, I again swear that there was no malice intended, so we're all good, right?

The Burdens of Being Different

I just got a new sticker for my car. It says simply, "You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at YOU because YOU'RE ALL THE SAME."

That's who I am, that's what I'm like. It seems the only way you can stand out from the crowd these days is to march to beat of your own drum instead of marching in lockstep behind the hoardes of Abercrombie and Gap-wearing crowd. Not that there's anything wrong with these people, it's just that I feel the need to ask them one question: "HAVE YOU EVER HAD AN INDEPENDENT THOUGHT IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE???"

I am talking to the majority of the 12-25 crowd, here, which I am a member of in age only. Just so you the reader know who I am referring to, I mean the people who watch MTV religiously so that they know what they're supposed to wear, what they're supposed to like musically, and so on.

As far as the music goes, you know where I'm going here. I'm talking about boy groups. By the way, that is what they are, they are NOT BOY BANDS, because they DON'T PLAY INSTRUMENTS! The only exception would be Hanson, but it's not like they have a career anymore. You know the drill, get five guys who are good-looking, teach them how to dance and sing, foist them on the public with a giganto media blitz, and there you go, instant phenomenon, just add water. Not that it works every time; all those guys trying out for that ABC series "Making the Band", and where did it get them? The series got canceled, and the furthest O-Town got was the Pokemon soundtrack. Oh well, we can't all be the Backstreet Boys. Oh, no wait, we can be if we're called 'N Sync, 98 Degrees, LFO, and so on and so forth. They all look the same, every song sounds the same, and soon they will all have movies that look the same. Stop laughing, 'N Sync is seriously making a movie. They claim to have creative control over the project, which means absolutely nothing, since if they have any idea other than look hunky, lip synch, and dance around for 90 minutes, it will wind up on the cutting room floor. This is the way it is. We thought it would be here today, gone tomorrow for these guys, but unfortunately, there is no reason to believe they're going away any time soon. In fact, I would offer up several million reasons why they won't be, as in their album sales. Time was that the second album was when the inevitable backlash would happen. It happened for Andy Gibb, it happened for New Kids on the Block, it even happened for the Spice GIrls. Of course, time also was that they helped do themselves in. Andy Gibb got into drugs, Donnie torched a couple of hotel rooms, and Ginger decided to go it alone. If any of these boy groups have done anything remotely illegal, nobody will ever know about it.

And finally, how else do you explain that an album of previously released singles that are all at least several months old has been #1 for two weeks? It's been advertised wall-to-wall on MTV, and so it's selling hundreds of thousands of copies. Have you ever heard of one of those cheesy K-Tel compilations in the 70s and 80s going to #1? Never happened.

Now for the clothes. It's no longer about trends and fads, it's more like what somebody in a boardroom somewhere thinks should be hot THIS week. I swear sometimes, I look at these Gap ads and I think somebody just threw a dart at a dartboard and exclaimed, "Corduroy!!! Yeah, let's bring that back this time!!!" You know what corduroy is? It's what kids my age wore in first or second grade until we realized that it was the 80s and pastels and ripped jeans were in. I stopped trying to interpret what was good and what wasn't when I decided to start wearing khakis at the start of the grunge fad. OK, so I was off by a couple years, it got me nothing but razzing. Never mind that now it's practically required in most suburban upper-class high schools. So, I gave up. I now wear jeans every day, no matter the situation, except for something like a fancy event that requires khakis. No cargo pants (what the hell does that mean, anyway, is it because they have so many damn pockets on them?), no different-colored jeans, and especially NO CORDUROY.

OK, confession time: the whole stickers on the car thing was insipired by my friend Mike. It wasn't completely independent on my part. And I watch MTV, but mostly to find things to make fun of (hell, how many hundred words have I gotten out of it so far?) I buy music because I like it, I like the lyrical content, I like a good screaming guitar solo. I was one of the only 10 people who bought Pearl Jam's new album and the live version of Pink Floyd's "The Wall". I don't know if any of you noticed those, they were on the shelf next to "Oops, I Did It Again" and "No Strings Attached". So some of the stuff I do because of other people, but not everything I do. I AM DIFFERENT, goddammit, and proud of it.

As scary as it is to believe, we should have listened to Fiona Apple when she proclaimed, "This world is bullsh--, go with yourself." Now she can't even sell an album.