This Just In

Here it is... my weekly-or-so take on things that affect us all, or just me. Feel free to comment on anything you read here, especially if something I wrote doesn't make sense to you. Or my take on things might just not make sense to you at all, and that's fine. We didn't always laugh at everything YOU said. And so, without any further ado...

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Now Is the Time to Be Like Europe

The G8 and G20 got together over the weekend in T.O. (that's Toronto in case you haven't been to Canada lately), and the heads of the world's richest economies all got together and discussed how they were going to extricate themselves from this ever-worsening global debt problem. The responses were a little startling. Europe, the cradle and incubator of socialism, said they couldn't afford to run welfare states anymore, and it was time to cut back. Nations like Britain and Germany with rapidly rising public debts stated that they did not want to be the next Greece, and to avoid being the next domino to fall they were going to do the right thing and start to balance their budgets.

This did not sit well with our president and his colleague in the American Left. President Obama admonished the leaders of Europe for what he felt was the wrong thing to do during an economic slowdown, debt or no debt, crisis or no crisis. He later backtracked from his statement, but his initial remarks spoke volumes. Paul Krugman with his Nobel Prize in Economics (which I will go to the grave never understanding how he won that) was more blunt, leading a recent column with the following statement:

Spend now, while the economy remains depressed; save later, once it has recovered. How hard is that to understand?

Yes, Mr. Krugman with his Nobel Prize must immediately be smarter than several world leaders, because he clearly seems to think that the David Camerons and Angela Merkels of the world have the IQ of cow dung to try to stave off bankruptcy and global economic meltdown. How dare they sell out the movement toward a world where government does everything for you and all you have to worry about is... whether or not you still have any rights or freedoms. Krugman goes on to admit that bloated health care costs will cause our debt to continue to balloon (but I thought health care reform was supposed to stop that), and then promotes the value-added tax that will likely make its way through Congress next year if (and, as I've said here previously, when) the Democrats get their 60-seat Senate majority back in November. That the VAT will flat-line our economy (when combined with cap-and-trade and the expiration of the Bush tax cuts, all likely to happen by next year) is irrelevant. We must spend, spend, spend, continue to rack up debt, based on the illusory promise that things will get better, and THEN we can address the trillions in debt that we owe to China and others who still dare to buy it.

Well, I guess I only have one question to ask Mr. Krugman, although I clearly am far inferior to him intellectually (after all, he has a Nobel Prize): What happens if things DON'T GET BETTER?!?

We spent nearly a trillion dollars on a stimulus package that resulted in unemployment going UP by over 2 percent... and don't give me this BS about jobs created or saved. It is IMPOSSIBLE to determine whether or not jobs are saved by government spending. Just ask the people in New York who run the Empire Zone program. This spending is the only reason our economy has grown at all the last couple of quarters, and as soon as the money runs out, bye-bye growth. As soon as the census is over, all those census workers go right back to unemployment and those numbers start to rise again. Consumer confidence is plummeting, investors are dumping stock like crazy because of the debt crisis in Europe... we are going to have a double-dip recession. And it will be a global one. BET ON IT.

Therefore, it doesn't take a Nobel Prize winner to realize that no matter how much money we spend that we don't have, the only result is going to be a bigger debt and a greater chance of default and global economic catastrophe. Therefore, we must cut back. People on the Left have told us for years that we need to be more like Europe, well now is the time. Do what Europe has done, and CUT SPENDING NOW! No more corporate welfare (including farms), and when we do end these tax breaks, DO NOT immediately say "we'll spend that money instead on..." NO! DON'T SPEND IT AT ALL!!! Many states right now are going through this exact mess trying to balance their budgets, which is *gasp* required... not such a bad idea to require a balanced budget, now is it?

In fact, let's do that! To this date, 32 states of petitioned Congress to consider a federal Balanced Budget Amendment. We only need 2 more states to get the two-thirds needed. People in these 18 remaining states should be pushing HARD for their state legislatures to make this happen, especially in light of the fact that so many at the state level have committed to making the tough choices necessary to balance their budgets. However, there is one important situation that cannot be addressed by the states: Medicaid. It is a federally-imposed boondoggle that eats up more of a state's budget every year, and usually leads to cuts elsewhere in order to keep things on par. Since the federal government has NO plans to eliminate the program, they should have to cover the yearly increases in Medicaid costs, at least until states can take them on (assuming a better economy).
Yes, people's pet projects will be eliminated, defense contracts will go by the boards, we may have to cut back our presence around the world (but that's another entry), other hard sacrifices would have to be made like raising the Social Security collection age.

That being said, I'm likely going to ruffle some feathers on the Right with what I'm going to say next. We know cuts alone won't balance a budget and pay down debt. They know this in Europe, and unfortunately they've had to raise taxes. While I am very much against cap-and-trade (for its nanny-state pedigree) and the VAT (we don't need one more tax that can be raised any time Congress feels like it), I'm afraid we're gonna have to let the Bush tax cuts expire and the pre-2001 tax rates go back into effect. However, note to Congress: THIS IS NOT A LICENSE FOR YOU TO SPEND THAT MONEY!!! I know it's wishful thinking that any of this could happen, but it's what has to happen, and too many people are concerned with blaming the other side for our problems and too few are concerned with FIXING THEM. In fact, to honor Paul Krugman, I'm going to officially propose that the federal government's new motto be: "We'll fix the problem... eventually."

How fitting that these global leaders chose to meet in Canada, as our neighbors to the north have perhaps the model economy for other nations to follow. As I wrote in this blog a few years ago, Canada bucks worldwide economic hiccups and keeps a mostly-balanced budget, so when it does have to pony up for an economic stimulus measure, it doesn't threaten to break the bank. And crazier still, it WORKS! Hopefully, each of the world leaders at last weekend's summit (Obama included) spent some time getting tips from Stephen Harper on how to correctly run a major nation's economy.

And one final note on the hoo-ha in Toronto over the weekend: As usual, the Seattle Mob was there in full force. Rather than give these terrorists (and that's what they are... rampaging through a major metropolitan downtown smashing windows and torching police cars is TERRORISM) the attention they so crave, I will instead thank the Toronto police for arresting some 560 of these terrorists over the course of the two days. This included the novel idea of raiding a university building where they were organizing so they could get the crazies before they even started their destruction. These arrests naturally started radical sympathizers believing that they live in a police state and it's their own version of Chicago '68, but I'm pretty sure the marchers in Chicago DID NOT INTEND TO COMMIT VIOLENCE AND DESTRUCTION. Therefore, way to go, T.O. po-po. Just one more reason to justify my adoration of Canadians.

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Sunday, June 20, 2010

Can You Read This Over the Annoying Horns?

The World Cup is once again taking place, this time in South Africa, and a nation that usually doesn't give a rat's ass about soccer (unless their kids are playing a youth game, in which case you better stay the heck out of their way) is getting psyched about watching "the beautiful game." Or maybe they're just psyched about the fact that the early-morning start times for many of the games allows them to get their drink on at the local bars WAY earlier than usual.

Anyway, the first thing you get treated to when turning on a World Cup game is a loud, harsh buzzing noise. No, it's not a killer bee invasion in South Africa, that is the sound of thousands of soccer fans blowing horns. In Africa, they are called vuvuzelas, but they're the conventional plastic horn that you hear occasionally from one or two guys at a hockey game, a CFL game, or (back in the day) a Montreal Expos game. Only in this case, it's thousands of people blowing horns at once... for no apparent reason other than the fact that they can. The result is, to say the least, annoying. In fact, if you just imagine the sound of vuvuzelas in your head, it may actually have the ability to drown out the words you are reading on the screen right now. And since my roommate got a surround-sound system for the apartment, let me tell you there is nothing quite like the surround-sound vuvuzela experience. I'm not saying that as a compliment.

And now we've had a non-stop succession of "being drowned out by vuvuzela" jokes, radio guys getting vuvuzelas and blaring them on-air, usually to drown out the news guy on your hometown's "morning zoo" show. Yeah, we Americans do get obsessed over silly things, don't we? But then again, we're the culture that embraced "Jersey Shore," which can be just as ear-splittingly annoying to listen to. The Florida Marlins gave out 15,000 mini-vuvuzelas last night to their fans, causing the game against the Tampa Bay Rays to sound like a smaller, higher-pitched version of a World Cup soccer game. Understandably, some players and umpires used earplugs. Hopefully, that was a one-time stunt, because if you think baseball purists got worked up over "thunder sticks", imagine how mad they'll be if vuvuzelas become a consistent staple at America's ballparks.

Speaking of complaining... in a typical display of elitist prissiness, the soccer community got outraged about the vuvuzelas and wanted them banned because they were ruining the World Cup experience. Of course, for many European favorites, this has quickly been replaced by the reality that it's their own team that is ruining their World Cup experience. England, France, Spain, Germany... all losing or tying games they were expected to win in the opening round. France's team is in total disarray, refusing to practice, and the team director has quit. And then of course, there was England's stunning 1-1 tie against her former colonies, which was caused primarily by their goalie's failure to stop an easy shot.

Now, the goalie in question has been benched, and conspiracy theories abound regarding how lousy the ball is that is being used at the World Cup. However, the always-entertaining British tabloids quickly found a much better excuse for the lackluster goaltending... his ex-girlfriend. Yeah, apparently he'd just been through a bad breakup, and you know how those high-profile relationships can be. Proving that imitation is the most sincere form of flattery, the Spaniards have also pinned their stunning loss to Switzerland on goaltender relationship issues. Expect an unofficial rule change in 2014: no girlfriends allowed during the Cup final. After all, as Mickey once told us in the movie "Rocky", "Women weaken the legs."

But nothing grabs the headlines in American sports quite like the blown call. The U.S. team stormed back from a 2-0 deficit against Slovenia to tie the game, and then appeared to score the game-winner, only to have it waved off due to a foul that nobody but the referee saw. Well, this mobilized the American sports media like few things can. And to be fair, the European commentators hired by ESPN for the cup also felt that we Yanks got hosed. Naturally the Slovenians played the "boorish American thuggery" card in saying it was the correct call and we did not deserve to win. The only people who agree probably live in Iran, North Korea, or Berkeley. And speaking of North Korea, who didn't love that one fan's sign that read, "Kim Jong Il thinks I'm at work"? Regardless of the impact of this incident on the U.S. team's chances going forward, I'll bet Jim Joyce was breathing a huge sigh of relief when this happened. His is no longer the "big blown call of the moment".

Another response to the World Cup, of course, is the cynical view of many that we Americans are just pretending to be a soccer-crazed nation for a few weeks, and that we really don't like soccer. Well yeah, they're right. We don't like soccer, but we like what it makes people do. It's fun watching whole nations go apoplectic over the result of a soccer game. We don't even get worked up that much for the Olympics (recent US-Canada hockey classics notwithstanding). We usually reserve that kind of hysterical reaction for things like Octomom and the KFC Double Down.

Here in Philadelphia, they're hoping the excitement generated by the World Cup will spill over into success for the new Major League Soccer franchise, the Philadelphia Union. However, just in time for the official MLS opener at brand-new PPL Park in Chester, the mayor of Chester has declared a state of emergency because of a recent string of homicides. Hopefully, this won't result in the cancellation of any games... because then there would really be violence. You don't want to piss off soccer fans...

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