Bowling For Morons, Part 1: How the Geeks Stole Christmas
Welcome to Advanced College Football Mathematics and Logic, otherwise known as NCAA 501. It has to be an advanced-level class, because apparently only the smartest among us know how to figure out this joke of a postseason system we have. I'll spare you the obligatory "the BCS has one too many letters" joke, we know it's BS; in fact, this year it's BS-squared. And so, the controversy (which I shall get to momentarily) rages on, and an endless parade of analysts get to come on our TV sets for the next several weeks and tell us why there should be a playoff system or what else is messed up with the system. This is done mainly to pass the time during the glut of meaningless 5th and 6th tier bowl games we now have to put up with (more on that next week).
Well, first thing's first, let's rev up our trusty BCS Rank-o-Meter and figure out how this whole mess came to be. In a perfect world, two teams would finish the year unbeaten and that would settle everything. Unfortunately, some team always comes along and plays the role of spoiler, throwing the system into utter chaos. In the past, this mess could not be solved, due to certain conference entanglements, including the fact that the Big Ten and Pac-10 were not allowed to win an outright national championship because their champions had to go to the Rose Bowl. Thus thwarting the national title bids of the 1991 Washington Huskies, 1994 Penn State Nittany Lions, and 1997 Michigan Wolverines, respectively. Washington and Michigan won half a title, and Penn State was stuck at #2. Makes you wonder why those 20, whoops, 21 (forgot Penn State) teams even bothered showing up to practice if they had nothing to play for. The closest any of them came was 1997, when Michigan won the Big Ten, entered the Rose Bowl at #1 in both the AP and Coaches poll. However, being from the Big Ten, they were forced to play a lower-ranked Washington State team, rather than #2 Nebraska. Michigan throttled Ryan Leaf and co. (a sure sign of things to come for Mr. Leaf), so they win it all, naturally, right?
Well, no. #2 Nebraska won their bowl game as well, and it just so happened to be legendary head coach Tom Osborne's last game. Michigan naturally won the AP's national title, but the coaches gave Nebraska their championship as a going-away present to Osborne. Considering Osborne already had a title to his credit, this was kinda pointless, but there it was. However, the coaches poll has always lacked legitimacy to me. First of all, they could never keep a sponsor, bouncing from UPI to CNN and now to ESPN and USA Today. And secondly, they reward teams that run up the score on inferior opponents. If Oklahoma beats the Sisters of St. Mary's 45-0, they may get some love from the coaches, but if they show no mercy (and considering they're playing sisters, that's a pretty rough thing to do) and win 80-0, they get an extra bounce in the polls. Hence Steve Spurrier's tendency over the years to keep his Florida starters in until late in the fourth quarter, just to ensure that 60-point margin of victory.
So, to fix this problem, the Bowl Championship Series was invented, and instead of writers and coaches flexing favoritism, the task of deciding a college football champion was left to a bunch of computer geeks. They each have their own way of determining strength of schedule and they enter the numbers into their IBM Big Blue or whatever the hell it is and it spits out two worthy teams. Then they factor in "quality wins" and how many losses they have and it all shakes out correctly, right?
Well, again, no. Miami made it easy on everyone, going unbeaten at 11-0, so they're clear-cut #1. Even the computers couldn't screw that one up. Oklahoma was unbeaten, but Nebraska beat them, then 2-8 Oklahoma State beat them. Oregon was unbeaten, but they blew a late lead to Stanford. Florida was unbeaten, but they lost to Auburn and then to Tennessee. Now, here's where it gets interesting... Nebraska was unbeaten, but they lost to Colorado, thus knocking them out of the Big 12 title game and ending their season with a loss. Also, did I mention they gave up 62 POINTS??? I thought Syracuse was the only ranked team capable of that. Texas then became the favorite, but Colorado upended them in the Big 12 title game. Tennessee got into the SEC title game with the #2 ranking, but LSU upset them. And did I mention BYU was unbeaten entering December as well? Only they were completely shut out, because by playing in the weaker Mountain West Conference, they weren't guaranteed a spot in the BCS. So, they threatened to sue the BCS (ah, you knew litigation had to enter this eventually) if they didn't get in. Then they promptly went out and had Hawaii hang 72 POINTS on them, ending their title shot.
So, who's left? Oregon has 1 loss, Maryland has 1 loss, Colorado has 2 losses, but they're obviously on a hot streak. And oh yeah, Nebraska has 1 loss, but remember it was their last game, and they gave up 62 POINTS to Colorado. So, who does the computer say is #2?
Nebraska. Sorry, Oregon and Colorado: Merry Christmas, you've been ho-ho-hosed.
Which leads me to wonder if these computer geeks even WATCH COLLEGE FOOTBALL!!! DO THEY EVEN KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT FOOTBALL??? Then again, you don't have to watch the games to enter your little statistics into your computer and spit out a result. Anyhoo, the point is, for the first time ever, a team has LOST its way into a shot at the national title. Hell, if they had won that game, then lost to Texas the next week, we wouldn't even be talking about this, it would be Miami vs. Texas. And not only that, they're ranked ahead of the team that hung 62 POINTS on them. So, the fur is flying, and the fans want a playoff system and the talking heads want to just yak cuz they get more face time from all of this (so much for only seeing Mel Kiper, Jr. on draft day).
You know what I think they should do??? GO BACK TO THE OLD SYSTEM!!! Sure the coaches putzed it up, but that can be solved. Here's what you do: if the AP says one team and the coaches say another, have a playoff, writer's pick vs. coaches pick. Play it at Tennessee's stadium, therefore ensuring a crowd well over 100,000. Bingo, instant champ, just add water. And it would actually bring back some life to this totally blah bowl system that is completely meaningless except for the last game. It's almost not worth sitting in front of the tube all day on New Year's Day and watching the bowls anymore, because they mean nothing. I want it to be just like 1983, where a Miami team can enter January 1 ranked 5th, watch #2, 3, and 4 lose or win a poorly played game, then upset #1 and steal the championship. That's what I like, Rose Bowl, Sugar Bowl, Cotton Bowl, Fiesta Bowl, Orange Bowl, all on the same day (some of them at the same time, so there's scoreboard-watching). Of course, since very few people want it, it'll probably never happen, but that's what happens when you have a complex solution to a simple problem. The only way people figure they can fix it is to mess it up even more, until eventually, you have something that doesn't even resemble the original.
Now, as for the 25 or so OTHER games that have to be played in the coming weeks, well, I'll reserve my comments on that for next week...
Well, first thing's first, let's rev up our trusty BCS Rank-o-Meter and figure out how this whole mess came to be. In a perfect world, two teams would finish the year unbeaten and that would settle everything. Unfortunately, some team always comes along and plays the role of spoiler, throwing the system into utter chaos. In the past, this mess could not be solved, due to certain conference entanglements, including the fact that the Big Ten and Pac-10 were not allowed to win an outright national championship because their champions had to go to the Rose Bowl. Thus thwarting the national title bids of the 1991 Washington Huskies, 1994 Penn State Nittany Lions, and 1997 Michigan Wolverines, respectively. Washington and Michigan won half a title, and Penn State was stuck at #2. Makes you wonder why those 20, whoops, 21 (forgot Penn State) teams even bothered showing up to practice if they had nothing to play for. The closest any of them came was 1997, when Michigan won the Big Ten, entered the Rose Bowl at #1 in both the AP and Coaches poll. However, being from the Big Ten, they were forced to play a lower-ranked Washington State team, rather than #2 Nebraska. Michigan throttled Ryan Leaf and co. (a sure sign of things to come for Mr. Leaf), so they win it all, naturally, right?
Well, no. #2 Nebraska won their bowl game as well, and it just so happened to be legendary head coach Tom Osborne's last game. Michigan naturally won the AP's national title, but the coaches gave Nebraska their championship as a going-away present to Osborne. Considering Osborne already had a title to his credit, this was kinda pointless, but there it was. However, the coaches poll has always lacked legitimacy to me. First of all, they could never keep a sponsor, bouncing from UPI to CNN and now to ESPN and USA Today. And secondly, they reward teams that run up the score on inferior opponents. If Oklahoma beats the Sisters of St. Mary's 45-0, they may get some love from the coaches, but if they show no mercy (and considering they're playing sisters, that's a pretty rough thing to do) and win 80-0, they get an extra bounce in the polls. Hence Steve Spurrier's tendency over the years to keep his Florida starters in until late in the fourth quarter, just to ensure that 60-point margin of victory.
So, to fix this problem, the Bowl Championship Series was invented, and instead of writers and coaches flexing favoritism, the task of deciding a college football champion was left to a bunch of computer geeks. They each have their own way of determining strength of schedule and they enter the numbers into their IBM Big Blue or whatever the hell it is and it spits out two worthy teams. Then they factor in "quality wins" and how many losses they have and it all shakes out correctly, right?
Well, again, no. Miami made it easy on everyone, going unbeaten at 11-0, so they're clear-cut #1. Even the computers couldn't screw that one up. Oklahoma was unbeaten, but Nebraska beat them, then 2-8 Oklahoma State beat them. Oregon was unbeaten, but they blew a late lead to Stanford. Florida was unbeaten, but they lost to Auburn and then to Tennessee. Now, here's where it gets interesting... Nebraska was unbeaten, but they lost to Colorado, thus knocking them out of the Big 12 title game and ending their season with a loss. Also, did I mention they gave up 62 POINTS??? I thought Syracuse was the only ranked team capable of that. Texas then became the favorite, but Colorado upended them in the Big 12 title game. Tennessee got into the SEC title game with the #2 ranking, but LSU upset them. And did I mention BYU was unbeaten entering December as well? Only they were completely shut out, because by playing in the weaker Mountain West Conference, they weren't guaranteed a spot in the BCS. So, they threatened to sue the BCS (ah, you knew litigation had to enter this eventually) if they didn't get in. Then they promptly went out and had Hawaii hang 72 POINTS on them, ending their title shot.
So, who's left? Oregon has 1 loss, Maryland has 1 loss, Colorado has 2 losses, but they're obviously on a hot streak. And oh yeah, Nebraska has 1 loss, but remember it was their last game, and they gave up 62 POINTS to Colorado. So, who does the computer say is #2?
Nebraska. Sorry, Oregon and Colorado: Merry Christmas, you've been ho-ho-hosed.
Which leads me to wonder if these computer geeks even WATCH COLLEGE FOOTBALL!!! DO THEY EVEN KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT FOOTBALL??? Then again, you don't have to watch the games to enter your little statistics into your computer and spit out a result. Anyhoo, the point is, for the first time ever, a team has LOST its way into a shot at the national title. Hell, if they had won that game, then lost to Texas the next week, we wouldn't even be talking about this, it would be Miami vs. Texas. And not only that, they're ranked ahead of the team that hung 62 POINTS on them. So, the fur is flying, and the fans want a playoff system and the talking heads want to just yak cuz they get more face time from all of this (so much for only seeing Mel Kiper, Jr. on draft day).
You know what I think they should do??? GO BACK TO THE OLD SYSTEM!!! Sure the coaches putzed it up, but that can be solved. Here's what you do: if the AP says one team and the coaches say another, have a playoff, writer's pick vs. coaches pick. Play it at Tennessee's stadium, therefore ensuring a crowd well over 100,000. Bingo, instant champ, just add water. And it would actually bring back some life to this totally blah bowl system that is completely meaningless except for the last game. It's almost not worth sitting in front of the tube all day on New Year's Day and watching the bowls anymore, because they mean nothing. I want it to be just like 1983, where a Miami team can enter January 1 ranked 5th, watch #2, 3, and 4 lose or win a poorly played game, then upset #1 and steal the championship. That's what I like, Rose Bowl, Sugar Bowl, Cotton Bowl, Fiesta Bowl, Orange Bowl, all on the same day (some of them at the same time, so there's scoreboard-watching). Of course, since very few people want it, it'll probably never happen, but that's what happens when you have a complex solution to a simple problem. The only way people figure they can fix it is to mess it up even more, until eventually, you have something that doesn't even resemble the original.
Now, as for the 25 or so OTHER games that have to be played in the coming weeks, well, I'll reserve my comments on that for next week...
Labels: college football
posted by Dave | 11:32 PM
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