Technolergy Ain't What It's Cracked Up to Be
"Modern conveniences" has got to be the biggest contradiction in terms since "Devil Rays baseball", especially in regard to computers. When you get a computer, in no way is it modern, considering that five minutes after you buy the computer, it's outdated. And by no means is a computer convenient. The only thing you may be conveniently able to do with a computer is throw it in the trash.
Consider if you will the fact that at this very moment, a problem with said modern convenience is forcing me to do something I have a serious problem with doing: using Microsoft Internet Explorer, or as I would more accurately put it, Internet Exploder. It's not a technical preference, I just don't like Microsoft, although I do use Windows, but mostly because I'm too lazy to learn something completely new like Linux. So I use Netscape, but unfortunately on this evening I am not using it due to the fact that my webpage creator of choice, Yahoo PageBuilder (again mostly out of laziness to not learn anything that didn't already come with the free webspace) does not work on Netscape. It hasn't for nearly two weeks. Now I don't know what this online public bitching may do. It may get the problem fixed or the good (or not) people at Yahoo may not approve of this and purge the very existence of this website. Either way, SOMETHING will get done.
And this is what we face every day of our lives when we own a computer. In my case, I have a computer that may seem to have been cursed with some awful evil incantation or the like when I bought it. The very nice energy saving feature that puts my computer into "sleep mode" when I am not using it is not quite as good at waking the damn thing back up. That and the fact that since I did not buy a new monitor with the new computer, the monitor I have seems to not like the new computer. That is the only way I can explain the following scenario that I have to go through on average once or twice a week:
I go to wake up the computer out of "sleep mode". After a half-hour or more of staring at a blank screen that will not turn on no matter what you do (even hitting the thing, which I have always learned is a foolproof way to fix what's wrong with most "modern conveniences"), I have to restart it. My opening screen pops up along with a message that my monitor is having issues with the computer and therefore if I want to see things in more colors than the conventional black and white, I need to restart it again. On restart #2, my screen pops up larger than normal, so I have to fix that. Which means I need to restart it again. Finally, on restart #3, we're up and running. Total time I have wasted: about 45 minutes.
Now my technology problems of late are not solely confined to my computer. I have a TV/VCR in my apartment. Theoretically, a VCR is designed to record programs that you want to watch later. However, my VCR has this delightful tendency to, well, NOT DO THAT. Every so often, when I program my VCR to record, say, two and a half hours of quality TV programming, I come home to find the thing stopped two minutes in. That's right, it recorded TWO MINUTES and then stopped. Don't know why, maybe paranormal phenomena or something, or maybe I'm offending the paranormal phenomena by linking them to something this heinous. Whatever the case, it has become an accepted part of everyday life for me. I go to work five or six days a week, I get paid twice a month, and every once in a while, the VCR won't work. Again, this can best be attributed to the fact that I'm lazy, and therefore would actually not endeavor to find out what is causing the problem, not even by testing it.
The running theme of all these stories, besides things not working as they should and the fact that they are all considered "modern conveniences", is laziness on my part. I for the longest time did not consider myself to be a lazy person, but after reading the laundry list of things that are wrong with my "modern conveniences" and the little I have done to fix them, I may have to change my mind. On the other hand, my old computer is gathering dust over in the corner as I have let it sit there for over six months swearing that EVENTUALLY, I will copy the rest of the stuff I still have on it that I need.
My point here is obvious: I and my fellow lazy Americans with similar non-functioning "modern conveniences" choose to do nothing because we are thankful for the fact that we have this wonderful technology. Confused? Simply, we settle for less than the optimum use of our appliances and our time BECAUSE WE CAN. I am proud to be an American, and therefore I am proud to buy something I know will not work 100% of the time and yet do absolutely nothing to make sure that it will work 100% of the time. This is because I believe that my 90% (or less) working appliances are still better than most people have. However, I also have the right to bitch and moan all I want about the fact that it does not work 100% of the time.
Let's face it, folks, modern technology may be the one thing that separates us from being, well, rednecks, or something worse. However, if that be my choice, I would sometimes be very tempted to rent a doublewide, put the Honda Civic up on bricks, and watch me some NASCAR. YEEEEEEHAAAAWWWWW!!!
Consider if you will the fact that at this very moment, a problem with said modern convenience is forcing me to do something I have a serious problem with doing: using Microsoft Internet Explorer, or as I would more accurately put it, Internet Exploder. It's not a technical preference, I just don't like Microsoft, although I do use Windows, but mostly because I'm too lazy to learn something completely new like Linux. So I use Netscape, but unfortunately on this evening I am not using it due to the fact that my webpage creator of choice, Yahoo PageBuilder (again mostly out of laziness to not learn anything that didn't already come with the free webspace) does not work on Netscape. It hasn't for nearly two weeks. Now I don't know what this online public bitching may do. It may get the problem fixed or the good (or not) people at Yahoo may not approve of this and purge the very existence of this website. Either way, SOMETHING will get done.
And this is what we face every day of our lives when we own a computer. In my case, I have a computer that may seem to have been cursed with some awful evil incantation or the like when I bought it. The very nice energy saving feature that puts my computer into "sleep mode" when I am not using it is not quite as good at waking the damn thing back up. That and the fact that since I did not buy a new monitor with the new computer, the monitor I have seems to not like the new computer. That is the only way I can explain the following scenario that I have to go through on average once or twice a week:
I go to wake up the computer out of "sleep mode". After a half-hour or more of staring at a blank screen that will not turn on no matter what you do (even hitting the thing, which I have always learned is a foolproof way to fix what's wrong with most "modern conveniences"), I have to restart it. My opening screen pops up along with a message that my monitor is having issues with the computer and therefore if I want to see things in more colors than the conventional black and white, I need to restart it again. On restart #2, my screen pops up larger than normal, so I have to fix that. Which means I need to restart it again. Finally, on restart #3, we're up and running. Total time I have wasted: about 45 minutes.
Now my technology problems of late are not solely confined to my computer. I have a TV/VCR in my apartment. Theoretically, a VCR is designed to record programs that you want to watch later. However, my VCR has this delightful tendency to, well, NOT DO THAT. Every so often, when I program my VCR to record, say, two and a half hours of quality TV programming, I come home to find the thing stopped two minutes in. That's right, it recorded TWO MINUTES and then stopped. Don't know why, maybe paranormal phenomena or something, or maybe I'm offending the paranormal phenomena by linking them to something this heinous. Whatever the case, it has become an accepted part of everyday life for me. I go to work five or six days a week, I get paid twice a month, and every once in a while, the VCR won't work. Again, this can best be attributed to the fact that I'm lazy, and therefore would actually not endeavor to find out what is causing the problem, not even by testing it.
The running theme of all these stories, besides things not working as they should and the fact that they are all considered "modern conveniences", is laziness on my part. I for the longest time did not consider myself to be a lazy person, but after reading the laundry list of things that are wrong with my "modern conveniences" and the little I have done to fix them, I may have to change my mind. On the other hand, my old computer is gathering dust over in the corner as I have let it sit there for over six months swearing that EVENTUALLY, I will copy the rest of the stuff I still have on it that I need.
My point here is obvious: I and my fellow lazy Americans with similar non-functioning "modern conveniences" choose to do nothing because we are thankful for the fact that we have this wonderful technology. Confused? Simply, we settle for less than the optimum use of our appliances and our time BECAUSE WE CAN. I am proud to be an American, and therefore I am proud to buy something I know will not work 100% of the time and yet do absolutely nothing to make sure that it will work 100% of the time. This is because I believe that my 90% (or less) working appliances are still better than most people have. However, I also have the right to bitch and moan all I want about the fact that it does not work 100% of the time.
Let's face it, folks, modern technology may be the one thing that separates us from being, well, rednecks, or something worse. However, if that be my choice, I would sometimes be very tempted to rent a doublewide, put the Honda Civic up on bricks, and watch me some NASCAR. YEEEEEEHAAAAWWWWW!!!
Labels: technology
posted by Dave | 4:13 PM
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