Surviving Christmas
We are well into the 2006 holiday season, and we're watching some old trends continue and new trends surface. It may be easy to get lost in everything that's going on, the dizzying display of lights, shopping, commercials, and lawsuits, so allow me to break some of it down for you.
Yes, I mentioned lawsuits. Every Christmas we get at least one of them, either threatened or actually in the courts, where someone gets offended about his holiday being excluded in a public display. We also get the occasional atheist who is offended that there is a public display AT ALL. This year, it's happening in Seattle, where they had to take down nine Christmas trees in the airport because a rabbi threatened to sue over the lack of a menorah display for Chanukah. Now hey, I'd love to solve the debate by noting that trees really have nothing to do with the nativity story and we can just call them "holiday trees" instead. Unfortunately, that would rile up Bill O'Reilly and the "War on Christmas" crowd, so we can't do that. So of course the solution is NO DISPLAY AT ALL. Merry Christmas.
Inevitably, someone is going to get pissed about a traditional Christmas display. Some call these people Grinches, I have a more appropriate name for them... one that cannot be printed here. Take for example, last Sunday in my hometown of Camillus. Every year, they put Santa on a fire truck and he rides around giving candy to the little kids. When I was a kid, that was a day everyone looked forward to... I'm sure it still is. Well, somebody online heard about this year's festivities, and immediately whined that it was a waste of taxpayer money. Gee I'm sorry, I wasn't aware that traditions need to be thrown out in the name of saving a buck. I'll remember that when you're getting excited about next year's Memorial Day parade in the village... or do you think that's a waste of taxpayer money, too?
A good escape would be the movie theatre, and there are plenty of options for good holiday viewing. Not necessarily holiday movies, cuz let's face it, when did the last good Christmas movie come out? Hint: Santa Clause 3 and Deck the Halls WERE NOT IT. But we do have an abundance of good movies for once, instead of the collection of junk and "Oscar-worthy" movies that nobody goes to. The new James Bond movie, "Casino Royale" is still doing well at the theatres, and if you haven't had the opportunity to see it, don't wait for it to come out on DVD. I had never seen a Bond movie in a theatre before this one, and this is certainly the best way to do it. The new Bond, Daniel Craig, of course is getting most of the attention, cuz the ladies like what they see, but more importantly, he fits the role of 007 as well as the best ones who have played him (in other words, not Timothy Dalton). Every good Bond movie has to have a great Bond girl, and we have that with Eva Green as Vesper Lynd, the sassy accountant who gives Bond all he can handle and then some. I won't give a lot away but they did everything right that you would expect in a Bond movie, and most importantly, they seem to have junked the computerized special effects that were so prevalent in "Die Another Day". If there's anything I can't stand about action movies these days, it's the feeling that you know what you're watching isn't real, but rather a bunch of actors running from a green screen.
The kids will like "Happy Feet", the animated penguin movie, so that takes care of them. Just before Christmas, we get the choice of a pair of sports-themed movies that caught my interest. First you have "We Are Marshall", about the real-life aftermath of the tragic 1970 plane crash that destroyed an entire college football program. Then there's "Rocky Balboa". Yeah, go ahead and roll your eyes, and believe me, there's a part of me that's been wishing Stallone stopped after "Rocky V"... hell he should have stopped after "Rocky III"... but I want to believe he's going to do one more SERIOUS turn in the role that made him famous. "Rocky IV" was just plain stupid, and although the plot of "Rocky V" was interesting, moviegoers didn't like a dark "Rocky" movie. So old-man Balboa steps back into the ring for one more round, and maybe Sly pulls it off. It's enough to actually get me in the theatre. Also noteworthy is "Black Christmas", coming out on Christmas Day... only because it may well be proof that Hollywood has used the last original idea it has left... a Christmas horror movie.
I direct you all to the theatres because it'll be a lot better than what you'll see if you turn on the TV this month. Oh sure, we have all the classic Christmas specials... "A Charlie Brown Christmas", "It's a Wonderful Life", and so on. We do have "The Polar Express" on network television, and that is a fantastic movie. But we also have a glut of miserable attempts to create a new Christmas classic. And so you'll get junk like "Robbie the Reindeer", "Olive the Other Reindeer", "The Year Without Santa Claus", and it goes on. Much like attempts to do new great Christmas songs, the truly good ones are few and far between, and most happened 40-50 or more years ago. We have to accept this and move on.
And in between all these Christmas specials are all the Christmas commercials... mostly Gap and Old Navy ads. I mean seriously, it seems like those are the only two commercials running right now. I can only derive two reactions from these ads: 1) I'm sorry, no matter how hard you try, I do not wish to get my "fash on"... nor do I believe that's a word... 2) I guess hoodies are officially out... because that's all these ads are pushing, and once it gets to that point, it's over.
More than anything, of course, Christmas is about one thing... guilt. Okay, I know what Christmas is REALLY about; it's about the spirit of giving and being with loved ones and helping those in need. However, some take it upon themselves to go so far overboard with this that if they feel you're not giving ENOUGH, they'll try to make you feel like you're deserving of a lump of coal in your stocking. You know what I'm talking about, the looks of disapproval when you don't put coins in the Salvation Army kettle every time you pass it... the people who want you to donate to every charity possible or you're nothing. My roommate the retail worker had to deal with that one... the charity representative went so far as to call her store "sad and depressing" because they wouldn't give to her charity in addition to the ones to which they already donate. Just remember, we all do what we can, so let us have the feeling that we really are making a difference and don't make us feel awful that we aren't making enough of one.
So it is possible to stay positive through all this holiday hype and hysteria, but you've gotta take it all in stride. And just remember, it's all over in two weeks.
Yes, I mentioned lawsuits. Every Christmas we get at least one of them, either threatened or actually in the courts, where someone gets offended about his holiday being excluded in a public display. We also get the occasional atheist who is offended that there is a public display AT ALL. This year, it's happening in Seattle, where they had to take down nine Christmas trees in the airport because a rabbi threatened to sue over the lack of a menorah display for Chanukah. Now hey, I'd love to solve the debate by noting that trees really have nothing to do with the nativity story and we can just call them "holiday trees" instead. Unfortunately, that would rile up Bill O'Reilly and the "War on Christmas" crowd, so we can't do that. So of course the solution is NO DISPLAY AT ALL. Merry Christmas.
Inevitably, someone is going to get pissed about a traditional Christmas display. Some call these people Grinches, I have a more appropriate name for them... one that cannot be printed here. Take for example, last Sunday in my hometown of Camillus. Every year, they put Santa on a fire truck and he rides around giving candy to the little kids. When I was a kid, that was a day everyone looked forward to... I'm sure it still is. Well, somebody online heard about this year's festivities, and immediately whined that it was a waste of taxpayer money. Gee I'm sorry, I wasn't aware that traditions need to be thrown out in the name of saving a buck. I'll remember that when you're getting excited about next year's Memorial Day parade in the village... or do you think that's a waste of taxpayer money, too?
A good escape would be the movie theatre, and there are plenty of options for good holiday viewing. Not necessarily holiday movies, cuz let's face it, when did the last good Christmas movie come out? Hint: Santa Clause 3 and Deck the Halls WERE NOT IT. But we do have an abundance of good movies for once, instead of the collection of junk and "Oscar-worthy" movies that nobody goes to. The new James Bond movie, "Casino Royale" is still doing well at the theatres, and if you haven't had the opportunity to see it, don't wait for it to come out on DVD. I had never seen a Bond movie in a theatre before this one, and this is certainly the best way to do it. The new Bond, Daniel Craig, of course is getting most of the attention, cuz the ladies like what they see, but more importantly, he fits the role of 007 as well as the best ones who have played him (in other words, not Timothy Dalton). Every good Bond movie has to have a great Bond girl, and we have that with Eva Green as Vesper Lynd, the sassy accountant who gives Bond all he can handle and then some. I won't give a lot away but they did everything right that you would expect in a Bond movie, and most importantly, they seem to have junked the computerized special effects that were so prevalent in "Die Another Day". If there's anything I can't stand about action movies these days, it's the feeling that you know what you're watching isn't real, but rather a bunch of actors running from a green screen.
The kids will like "Happy Feet", the animated penguin movie, so that takes care of them. Just before Christmas, we get the choice of a pair of sports-themed movies that caught my interest. First you have "We Are Marshall", about the real-life aftermath of the tragic 1970 plane crash that destroyed an entire college football program. Then there's "Rocky Balboa". Yeah, go ahead and roll your eyes, and believe me, there's a part of me that's been wishing Stallone stopped after "Rocky V"... hell he should have stopped after "Rocky III"... but I want to believe he's going to do one more SERIOUS turn in the role that made him famous. "Rocky IV" was just plain stupid, and although the plot of "Rocky V" was interesting, moviegoers didn't like a dark "Rocky" movie. So old-man Balboa steps back into the ring for one more round, and maybe Sly pulls it off. It's enough to actually get me in the theatre. Also noteworthy is "Black Christmas", coming out on Christmas Day... only because it may well be proof that Hollywood has used the last original idea it has left... a Christmas horror movie.
I direct you all to the theatres because it'll be a lot better than what you'll see if you turn on the TV this month. Oh sure, we have all the classic Christmas specials... "A Charlie Brown Christmas", "It's a Wonderful Life", and so on. We do have "The Polar Express" on network television, and that is a fantastic movie. But we also have a glut of miserable attempts to create a new Christmas classic. And so you'll get junk like "Robbie the Reindeer", "Olive the Other Reindeer", "The Year Without Santa Claus", and it goes on. Much like attempts to do new great Christmas songs, the truly good ones are few and far between, and most happened 40-50 or more years ago. We have to accept this and move on.
And in between all these Christmas specials are all the Christmas commercials... mostly Gap and Old Navy ads. I mean seriously, it seems like those are the only two commercials running right now. I can only derive two reactions from these ads: 1) I'm sorry, no matter how hard you try, I do not wish to get my "fash on"... nor do I believe that's a word... 2) I guess hoodies are officially out... because that's all these ads are pushing, and once it gets to that point, it's over.
More than anything, of course, Christmas is about one thing... guilt. Okay, I know what Christmas is REALLY about; it's about the spirit of giving and being with loved ones and helping those in need. However, some take it upon themselves to go so far overboard with this that if they feel you're not giving ENOUGH, they'll try to make you feel like you're deserving of a lump of coal in your stocking. You know what I'm talking about, the looks of disapproval when you don't put coins in the Salvation Army kettle every time you pass it... the people who want you to donate to every charity possible or you're nothing. My roommate the retail worker had to deal with that one... the charity representative went so far as to call her store "sad and depressing" because they wouldn't give to her charity in addition to the ones to which they already donate. Just remember, we all do what we can, so let us have the feeling that we really are making a difference and don't make us feel awful that we aren't making enough of one.
So it is possible to stay positive through all this holiday hype and hysteria, but you've gotta take it all in stride. And just remember, it's all over in two weeks.
posted by Dave | 9:02 PM
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