Radio Pet Peeves

I'm doing a lot of traveling this summer, and I also listen to many out-of-town stations while I'm in Philadelphia, so I get to hear a lot of different radio stations with a lot of different DJs and a lot of different approaches. There's a lot of good stuff and a lot of stuff that, frankly, pisses me off. Yes, I have my thoughts about how radio should be done, but I also think there are a lot of things that just make common sense to the average radio listener, or at least should. Therefore, when these common-sense things are not done, it tends to piss me off. Hence, what follows are some of my radio pet peeves...

First of all, it drives me up the wall when I hear a really good song on the radio that I have not heard before or do not know precisely the artist and title, and I listen to hear the DJ tell me what the song was... and the DJ doesn't tell me. Sometimes, it's because the DJ may have introduced the song and I tuned in about 30 seconds into the song; other times, the DJ doesn't talk AT ALL... either because the station is "jockless" (and I'll get to my issues with that) or because the station's formatics mandate that they go straight from the song (or the last song in that set) into the commercial break. True, there are ways to look up a song title and artist now, either online through a station's website, or through smartphone apps that will display title and artist, but I don't always have access to those things, so the best way would be the "good old-fashioned" way of the DJ telling me what he/she just played.

I really shouldn't have to ask for DJs to do this, and neither should Dan Mason, the president of CBS Radio, who recently put out and edict for CBS DJs to do just that. However, such is the state of radio today. Mason recognizes that in the last 20 or so years, the idea of frontselling (telling the listener what is about to play) and backselling (telling the listener what was just played) went out the window as unnecessary "clutter". Probably because it required the DJ to talk for more than 10 seconds, and we just can't have that, can we? Yes, I know, the PPMs supposedly tell us that when a DJ talks AT ALL, the listener changes the station. Frankly, that's bullshit. The listener changes the station when he/she is no longer getting something he/she feels is useful. Giving the title and artist of a song IS USEFUL. Hell, even consultants understand this (although I will be letting them have it later...)

Of course, a key to this forgotten practice of ID'ing songs and artists is HOW you go about doing it. Yes, it may require you to do some (*gasp*) SHOW PREP, which I said last time out is one of the important "dos" in radio. You have to put some thought into it, have artist info ready to go and the many other ways to make this piece of information NOT be clutter. We had a policy when I was an Alt-Rock DJ and PD that we ALWAYS backsell a brand new song, and should always try to frontsell or backsell any current songs so that people who don't listen that often and haven't heard the song yet can find out. Mason says he is looking into lively ways to go about doing this, such as having the artists pre-record intros. That's all well and good, but I've heard one thing that you CANNOT do...

There's a radio station in Philadelphia (I won't give the name of it, but it starts with a letter, ends with a number, and plays standard "listen at the office" fare) that backsells every song... with an automated voice giving the artist and title. And you can tell it's automated... especially when the real DJ comes on immediately afterward and starts talking about some station promotion or something. No, that doesn't scream "this air shift was pre-recorded". If you're going to ID songs and artists, it would be nice to have the ACTUAL DJ DO IT... and preferably live.

To do it this way just says "no effort" to me... no effort to connect with listeners, just going through the motions. Another pet peeve of mine that says this? PDs who think you should not do remotes anymore. For example, an Alt-Rock PD in Buffalo. He said in a recent interview that "remotes are the worst thing a station can do these days." Why? Because "it's some part-timer standing at a table full of prizes that no one wants... set up far away from the actual people." Sounds to me like you don't know how to do remotes. I loved doing remotes... and at my station, we made sure that we had a prize you could win that made it worth the trip to come see us, something like concert tickets. None of the DJs were embarrassed to be seen at something like that. So I'm sorry that this guy's station probably doesn't have the promotions budget it used to, but to me when you say, "I don't know why (remotes) still happen," you're really saying, "I don't know why I should actually have to MEET our listeners." THAT is what remotes are for... to get out there and actually have face-to-face contact with your audience. If you can't see that, then maybe you're too jaded to be able to do a good job, and maybe you should be replaced by someone with passion and hunger.

Staying within the Alt-Rock world, my next pet peeve... Alt-Rock stations that play Adele. "Rolling In the Deep" is currently #17 on the Alt-Rock airplay chart. Now I have nothing against the song... I've heard it plenty of times now, it has grown on me, it's a very good Pop song. And that's what it is... a POP song. In fact, it's the #1 Pop song in America right now, which leads me to ask why the #1 Pop song in America is being played on so-called Alternative rock stations. And it's not like Adele is an artist who started out in Alt-Rock radio and crossed over. She is a POP singer, period. She is the antithesis of Alternative. Therefore, no Alternative station should be playing her. Ever. If you consider your station to be Alternative, then actually play stuff that is Alternative, and by that I mean things that are outside the mainstream. That just makes sense.

National contests also drive me nuts, and they should drive everyone nuts. Again, this is just the way things work in our consolidated, conglomerated world of radio... instead of owning 100 Pop stations that each try to give away cash and trips, cut all their promotions budgets and just do one contest on all 100 stations. Saves money, harms the connection between station and audience... but who cares about that when you have billions in debt service to pay off and stockholders to keep happy?

And my last radio pet peeve: Consultants... PERIOD. Any time I see some consultant shoot his mouth off about what works in (insert major market here) and therefore should work in any other market, it makes me want to shoot MYSELF. For example, I recently read a consultant piece where he pretty much advocated for the same 350-400 song back catalog that every radio station has today that any average listener you talk to says is TOO small and TOO repetitive. And the consultant SWEARS that any song beyond those overplayed 350-400 songs is something that people don't want to hear, and he of course has the auditorium music test results to prove it. Furthermore, if you have a deep library and are a successful station, it must be because your competition doesn't do a good enough job "and you're winning by default." I would counter that maybe the listeners in this particular market LIKE VARIETY!!! They like to hear a song they haven't heard in ages come up every so often! Dear god, do NOT let this person behind the wheel at WMMR or some other station that prides itself on its massive music library and gets great ratings doing it! I give the guy credit for saying that we need to bring localism and personality back into radio, but that's only part of it. If you bring in a personable, funny air personality who is in tune with your community, but he's still introducing the same 3 Lynyrd Skynyrd songs or the same 3 Jimi Hendrix songs, it's not going to work as well.

Now by giving these pet peeves and my advice on how to fix them, am I not myself being a consultant? Well, no... I think of myself as more of an "anti-consultant." I don't go on market research, I go on common sense. I'm pragmatic, a qualitative thinker instead of a quantitative thinker. Therefore, I am not my own pet peeve... not on this topic anyway.