This Just In

Here it is... my weekly-or-so take on things that affect us all, or just me. Feel free to comment on anything you read here, especially if something I wrote doesn't make sense to you. Or my take on things might just not make sense to you at all, and that's fine. We didn't always laugh at everything YOU said. And so, without any further ado...

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Everybody Loves a Good (2010) List

2010 is about to end and so it is time to take stock of the year and everything that happened in it... wait, what's that? You mean, people have already been doing that for a whole month?

Yes, that's right. Yahoo started doing their 2010 Year in Review on DECEMBER 1. I guess they figured that since all the relevant music albums had been released, all the award nominations had been made (the Oscar noms won't come until January), well, nobody's going to do anything in December so we're good. Does pop culture take December off? Apparently, most people who write these things up must believe this. Hence you get the celebrity obituary lists that stop right at the beginning of December… apparently because they just couldn’t take the time to add to it when someone passed this month. Good thing Leslie Nielsen died right before December 1, he might have been left off all of the celebrity deaths lists otherwise and we may have forgotten he was no longer with us. Give me a break. I wait until the last possible moment because I understand that popular culture never lets up, not even for the holidays, so if something noteworthy happened this month, you can rest assured that I included it in here.

On a side note, I really hope people don't start writing up their year in reviews for actual news that early. Otherwise, I’ll bet people who have the assignment of writing “year in review” stories probably got pissed off every time the lame duck Congress passed something last week. “Aw CRAP, I gotta go back and edit AGAIN!”

In my current home city of Philadelphia, the early part of 2010 was dominated by the word "snowpocalypse". 2 feet here, 2 feet there, a record snowfall that placed Philly in the unusual position of being in the top 5 snowiest U.S. cities last winter. Lately, Mayor Nutter has been thrown under the snowplow for his response to last weekend's snowstorm, but I thought he did a good job with the snow last winter, and that should be a good endorsement coming from a native of Syracuse. Much of the year was also dominated by the misuse of another recently-minted term: "flash mob". In other cities, flash mobs are fun word-of-mouth happenings where unaware shoppers suddenly are confronted with a group of people doing the Hammer dance or singing Mariah Carey Christmas songs. In Philadelphia, flash mobs are groups of urban youths trashing shopping districts. The paranoia got so bad at one point that on a Friday night in April, police were put on alert of "suspicious crowds" gathering near the Temple campus... it was college students who were out celebrating the first warm weekend of the year.

Back in Syracuse, construction finished in Armory Square... and although nothing happened at Carousel Mall, the deal reached between Citigroup and Destiny ensures that at least the mall expansion will finish. Look for more legal shenanigans in 2011 when Mayor Miner tells Bob Congel that he now owes property taxes because "phase 2" is unlikely. SU basketball went to #1 in the country and the citizenry dreamed of a second national championship. Then they lost right away and lost again in the Sweet 16... and people were calling for Jim Boeheim's head. SU football finally returned to winning ways, starting 7-3 and ensuring the first winning season in 9 years and first bowl bid in 6 years, and the citizenry dreamed of a national ranking and a Big East Championship and BCS bid. Then they lost their last 2 games... and people were calling for Doug Marrone's head.

But hey, we've all gotta complain about something, right? And so it is in that spirit that I present my annual list of the goods and bads, the ups and downs, and the just plain WTF moments that make up the year that was:

Dumb Lawsuit of the Year: A Florida resident filed for an order of protection against Tim Tebow (yeah, the Heisman Trophy winner and current Broncos QB) stating that he was getting attacked by Tebow fans after he criticized the quarterback. I realize Tebow's fans put him up on the sort of pedestal that might suggest he is a God-like figure ordering his followers to retribution, but really we're dealing with someone who is completely Four Loko. Perhaps a better suit would be for a restraining order against football commentators telling us how awesome Tebow is. And while you're at it, could you stop ESPN from doing one-hour specials every time Coach K at Duke passes someone on the all-time basketball coaching wins list?
Honorable Mention (because not technically a lawsuit): NOW tried to shut down several Hooters locations because, the group claimed, a Hooters is not a “restaurant” but a “sexual entertainment” establishment, and therefore in violation of state laws preventing minors from being allowed in such places. It’s stunts like this that give legitimate feminism a bad name.

Dumb PETA Protest of the Year: After having to cancel a 4th of July fireworks show due to limited finances, PETA asked Jersey City to ban all future fireworks displays because they cause animals to panic. They said a laser show would be safer... of course as soon as a wayward hawk gets hit with one of the laser lights and flies into a brick wall, they'll want to ban that too...

Smart PETA Protest Response of the Year: Dodge responded to PETA’s protest of the use of a monkey in one of their commercialsby switching to an “invisible monkey”. Way to tell them, "Protest this!" Knowing PETA, I'm shocked that they didn't.

You Probably Missed This One: Rep. Barney Frank, after telling anyone who saw the Fannie/Freddie collapse coming to cool it because nothing was going to happen (oh and he just happened to be accepting more campaign cash from Fannie and Freddie than any other Congressman), all of a sudden this summer recommended that Fannie and Freddie be abolished and replaced by a fully-government-run entity. Wow, way to propose a federal power grab AND cover your tracks at the same time...

Worst New Political Trend of 2010: Vilifying appellate judges when they make controversial rulings. First, we had the Right trying to “out” Vaughn Walker when he ruled against Prop 8 (after all, only a gay judge would rule for gay rights), most recently we had the Left attacking Henry Hudson when he ruled the health care mandate unconstitutional. I don’t care what interest group he is tied to, read the damn ruling. There is no precedent for such a ruling, that is what an appellate judge is SUPPOSED to do. You want precedent, wait for it to reach the SCOTUS. The way things are going, soon any time a federal judge makes a ruling on something, we’ll immediately hear, “Well in (such-and-such year), he/she voted for a Republican (or Democrat), so he/she can’t possibly be impartial…”

Avril Lavigne v. The Rubinoos Moment of the Year: Lady Antebellum’s smash “Need You Now”… sounds a little too much like “Eye in the Sky” by Alan Parsons Project, only without the really cool opening part that gets used for NBA team introductions. Honorable Mention: Michael Jackson’s posthumous ripoff of Hootie & the Blowfish’s “Hold My Hand”.

Enough Already: Please, no more car commercials with hockey goalies (past or present) telling me that I will “save”. Nothing worse than a bad pun repeated AD NAUSEUM.

Best Commercial: The Kia ad with the gangsta rappin’ hamsters. I mean it's hamsters rapping!
Honorable Mention: Alec Baldwin did a series of ads for Wegmans after he told David Letterman that his mother couldn't live without the place (and really, who can?) They shot the ads at the Wegmans where his mother shops... in Fairmount, NY. Oh by the way, that's the Wegmans I've gone to since I was a kid. Yeah, I geeked out a little over that...

Hypocrisy, Thy Name is Jerry: You may recall my entry from a few months ago about the so-called “performance tax” being proposed for radio and how it is not only NOT a tax but how it has been spun out of control by people with an agenda. When the NAB reached a compromise in October that would pretty much give radio all it wanted while still accepting that they have to pay the royalties that stations in EVERY OTHER COUNTRY EXCEPT IRAN have to pay, the usual suspect Jerry Del Colliano continued to maintain that it was a tax, that it will go up, and that the music industry is out to destroy radio. The only problem is that to see this spin in more detail, you now have to SUBSCRIBE to his site. Using your logic, Jerry, wouldn’t that mean that you just imposed a TAX on your readers? But I guess bloggers have to make money too… just like musicians do… Anyway, the deal fell apart, which means we may well see this issue continue to be slugged out in 2011.

Most Overplayed Song: “Kings and Queens” by 30 Seconds to Mars. Not necessarily the most played song, but this was the song that was put in seemingly EVERY OTHER commercial and new TV show in 2010, which is the easiest way to win this honor. Also, 30 Seconds to Mars is an overrated band that sounds like every other hard rock band, with a "lead singer" who can’t sing and is only popular because he was “Jordan Catalano” on “My So-Called Life”.

Who We Will Talk About in Music in 2011: The Arcade Fire, Mumford & Sons, Nicki Minaj, Lady GaGa, Foo Fighters, Beck, Blink 182, No Doubt... in a lot of ways it'll be the return of the 90s, and why not, we've reached the 20-year mark so it's time for the pop culture recycling treatment.

Who Should Just Go Away in 2011: Ke$ha, Willow Smith, Justin Bieber, bands that cannot think of anything to write songs about besides sex and drugs (and the radio programmers who love said bands), and anyone who thinks that Kings of Leon is turning into the new Nickelback.

Predictions I Was Right On This Year: I knew Drake was only going to continue getting bigger in 2010. I said Syracuse football could finish 7-5 (although I was conservative and said 6-6 was more likely, but I'll take this one). I called the last "Shrek" movie decimating "MacGruber" at the box office, but anyone with half a brain could have called that. I said Wade Phillips would get whacked in Dallas, although I didn't think it would happen so early in the season. And oh yeah, the NFC West is definitely still the Worst Division in Football.

Predictions I Totally Blew: Well the Black Eyed Peas and Shinedown obviously didn't go away, I changed my mind about Lady GaGa around the time of the meat dress so I don't feel bad that she didn't go away. I wanted the Mets to finish at .500, they didn't. In case you're wondering, that's my same prediction for next year. I said the Eagles would finish 8-8 but nobody foresaw what Michael Vick would do when he was given the chance over Kevin Kolb. Oh, and I said the Nats would be a Wild-Card contender once Strasburg came up and the Braves would finish in last place. Oops.

Best New Album I Got This Year: Well, I'm a dirt-poor doctoral student so there aren't many to choose from, but I believe the best decision I made music-wise this year was to plunk down for The Scarlet Ending's album, "Ghosts". This is what we should hear more of on the radio, rather than the aforementioned hard rock bands that only sing about "I Hate You But The Sex Is Good So Let's Get Drunk And Watch Porn Stars Dancing".

And Finally: We're already getting inundated with promos for New Year's events that make use of the date being 1-1-11. It's not quite the same numerical serendipity that occurs with a same number day-month-year thing like 11-11-11, but we only get to mark these things a limited number of times in the early part of a century, so go with it. More importantly, it reflects the fact that a new year means a new start, and let's face it, 2010 wasn't the greatest of years, so Happy 1-1-11 to 1... I mean one, and all...

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