The End-of-Decade Blues

Is it just me, or has music really sucked lately?

Actually, I know for a fact that it is not me (this time). I've been talking to a lot of people lately for my thesis research, and the opinion is nearly unanimous. In the words of Billy Joel, "Music she ain't what she used to be." We seem to be suffering the same malady in the current pop music scene that has affected Hollywood: a total and disturbing lack of original ideas. Turn on the radio right now and you hear a lot of the same that we've heard the last few years. Another knock-off emo band, another song trying to teach you a new dance; even when the names change, the beat still sounds the same.

Worse yet, we have bands and artists continuing to poach whatever bygone hit songs they can get their hands on for their own uses, and apparently it's become slim pickings. How else can you explain the hard rock band Seether covering "Careless Whisper" by Wham? I mean, this is a joke, right? A tongue-in-cheek thing, like Alanis Morissette covering "My Humps", right? Oh wait, you're doing this song seriously? Dude...

That about sums up my reaction when I hear that song. I cannot take it seriously. Funny thing is I haven't been able to change the station when it comes on. It's like a car wreck; you really shouldn't look at it, but you rubberneck, you take your time looking at it. Then aside from Seether covering Wham, you have Flo Rida openly swiping the hook from Dead or Alive's "You Spin Me Round and Round" (like anyone who lived through the 80s wouldn't have caught that), and Kelly Clarkson apparently plagiarizing herself from two albums ago.

So yeah, there's a lot of the same old thing going around these days. When we think the biggest things to look forward to in rock are the new U2 and Green Day albums, you want to get excited but then you realize these bands have both been around for a LONG time. Nothing against U2 and Green Day, I like both of them, but can't anyone else rise to their level right now? The best we get is Nickelback. Dear god... these guys can't go away fast enough. This is why young adults aren't listening to radio anymore, because at any time of day, I could scan the 6 presets on my car radio's FM1 band and Nickelback could be on 5 of them (the 6th is a classic rock station). And we can recycle Kid Rock because he managed to destroy "Werewolves of London" and "Sweet Home Alabama" in the same song, but we can't play anything from the new Blues Traveler album? Is there really a rule that says, "Only bring back a group if anybody with taste can't stand them?" How else do you explain the New Kids on the Block revival?

Here's my personal barometer that tells me how bad music is getting... I download the songs that I really like from each year and make them into mix CDs summing up that particular year. Those CDs and certain songs can remind me of certain things that happened that year. This year, so far, has been pretty light as far as songs I saw fit to download and hang onto at this point. Actually, I should say it has been pretty "lite"... as in the music itself has been pretty down and depressing. Don't get me wrong, I like a good lush and moody arrangement once in a while, but when your current playlist goes from a rare Offspring ballad to Coldplay to Death Cab to a not-quite-rocking U2 song... I start to wonder if I'm really depressed and don't realize it or if that's just where the decent music is now.

We seem to be heading into a "doldrums" period in music. Permit me to explain: radio consultant and Top 40 guru Guy Zapoleon once came up with the idea that pop music goes in cycles. When things are down, there will inevitably be a "rebirth" with a lot of good rock and R&B music, followed by a period of "extremes" where things get a little out of control, and then it all implodes and we're left with in the "doldrums" of lite rock and music that we will one day look back at and laugh. Doldrums periods made stars out of people like Gilbert O'Sullivan, Christopher Cross, and Nelson. Now do you see why I'm a little bit concerned?

I want to be happy that Eminem came back, because he's one of the few who can save us from crappy music, but we can't just rely on him to crank out a new album every time music starts to go downhill. A lot of the blame falls on radio programmers afraid to take chances, record companies afraid to take chances, and well, the people who just aren't willing to listen anymore. There is a big disconnect right now: the people have their own favorite artists, and once in a while, the machine gets it right and plays them. Most of the time, however, they stay underground until they come forth with the big "radio hit", and then it may be good for the artist in the short-term because it gives them a top-selling album, but it does permanent damage because their fans deem them to have sold out and stop listening to them. Eventually, the band or artist returns to that which made their original fans like them in the first place, but only after they can't sell albums with radio hits anymore.

What's the solution? I think a lot of our troubles go back to when music stations stopped listening to the people (remember the old music surveys you could fill out in your favorite record store?), and started listening to the consultants tell them what the hits are. I find it hilarious that stations keep the consultants on retainer with their big contracts and justify the expense by dumping the live DJs and replacing them with voice-tracking. Reversing the process is the only way to fix this, but it would take an entire collapse of the radio industry as we know it today for that to happen.

Or we just sit and wait for the next rebirth. That's all we may be able to do at this point. Enjoy the doldrums, people...